Check it Out: Picanto 1.1 vs. Saga 1.3

There are so many terrible grey patches in my life but at least this is looking better. Now my dad is indecisive between two cars he might get for me and Ben for our further education. It's now a debate between Proton and Naza Kia now...

My dad could either get a Proton Saga 1.3;

• Solid exterior design
• Larger space, boot compartment and etc
• Nice sweet design
• More long distance traveling friendly
• Terrible interior design
• Horrible gear design
• 1.3 litre higher petrol consumption
  

Or, the the Naza KIA Picanto 1.1;

• 1.1 litre car, less petrol consumption
• excellent interior design
• very cute exterior design (lights)
• hatchback design (less boot space)
• not ideal for long distance traveling
• same price with SAGA, a bigger CC car which makes it expensive

So, I don't really know which one my dad will get me now. He looks to be more on the Picanto but maybe he might change his mind? How about you? Poll is on your right.

Error 404: Nobody Knows

I'm seriously running out of decent titles for my posts which I guess, causes me to just crap out whatever lyrics come out from my headphones... Not even completely sure why I'm blogging tonight. By right I should get some sleep but well, I'm not... even though I have classes at eight in the morning...

Been watching a new series, in fact two new series. Well, actually they've been around since 05 so they're not actually new but they're quite good. How I met Your Mother is a nice comedy that's easy to follow which cheers me up every once in awhile. Then there's Dexter, not your average series.

Dexter's a series about a forensic's scientist who's gifted at the art of blood analysis and by night, he's a psychopathic serial killer. Well, what makes Dexter so special is that he's a psychopath, in which by definition means, he has no feelings. He feels nothing. No guilt, no happiness, no anger, no love, no sexual desire, nothing. The only thing inside him internally is only a growing urge to kill and due to his occupation, catching him ain't easy. However, Dexter Morgan only kills people who deserve to die. People who do bad things to people like rapists, murderers, J. Wong and so forth. It's a pretty good series for those who want something more than just the average bundle of crap. However, it's strictly PG-18 so Jenny might wanna steer clear...

However, I did not stay up at night to talk about ol' Dexter Morgan here. I guess I'm here to pour out some of my internal frustrations I guess. Stress has been getting the better of me and I don't have much decent means to relieve myself of them. I'm also frustrated with so much of the bullshit that I'm getting in my life, especially in comparison with others...

Think about it. I'm one of the higher students in my course, could say that I'm in the top twelve amongst all of them and with all the hardwork and effort that I commit myself to in my work, sometimes I still don't think that there's a fair means to whatever reward so to speak I get.

For example, I commit late hours like these into my work and assignments in which I often do alone in terrible conditions in a shitty college which imposes high standards of grading to it's students in which they cannot deliver. Whereas there are other people, you know who I'm talking about, sitting their asses off in places like Monash and just pratically fool around all the fucking time and they just get the fucking green side of the grass.

How I would feel is as if I had worked shitty hours of 9 to 5 plus ovetime of two hours a day to my job in which I give my heart and soul to and even my boss appraises my efforts and what not but in the end, I drive home a fucking Proton Saga and stare at the broken ceiling asking myself when is the better part of life going to come. Then on the other side of the world, there's some lame lazy ass employee which comes for work at lunch hour and leaves at three o clock everyday and calls in sick three times a week even though the boss knows he's late and allows it. In the end, he cruises home in his BMW M3 and ships out in his Italian yacht for fishing in the Gold Coast and the motherfucker complains about his caviar being too overdone...

Life is undoubtedly unfair but as we say it's unfair, who is the one that's on the advantagous side of it? Goddamn it...

Still, my dad told me something about this...

_______________________________________________

Life is going to be like that but eventually when it comes down to it, you are going to be the one that delivers and when those felles who just enjoy life and complain about everything, nobody would want to employ them and instead, you will be the one who gets to enjoy life. It's all a matter of time.

-Dad-

_______________________________________________

I guess perhaps I'm just hanging onto this promise. The promise of a better future. The distant promise away and there is nothing to do except to wait and to do my best still at what I do to secure this future...

GameWise: Year of Reluctance

Late 2009 and early 2010 is supposed to be the time where gamers go absolutely gaga over the end year releases and the holiday Christmas titles and what not. Although we see the return of many anticipated hits such as Assassin's Creed 2, Bioshock 2, Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2, Dragon Age: Origins, Left 4 Dead 2 and what not along with new releases like Dark Void, Bayonetta and etc, recent titles have seemed to disappoint more than they have impressed. Making 2009 a year of reluctance.

ASSASSIN'S CREED II

Supposed to be the ultimate game of 2009 that could take on the tyranny of Infinity Ward's Modern Warfare 2, initial footages and reviews of Desmond Miles' second trip into the animus seems to be more disappointing than ever. For a game that's suppose to be built around the criticisms of fans, the game still retains some it's fundamental flaws like retarded A.I. and repetitive gameplay. Although Ubisoft Montreal has promised billions of times in TGS, E3 and whatever game conventions out there that AC2 is all about diversity, it seems to just lack the proper execution. Besides that, poorly designed character models that at most, resemble late PS2 models is not suppose to be in our gaming era today. All these flaws make Assassin's Creed 2, a big disappointment of 2009.

BIOSHOCK 2

There are many games out there that can barely scrap what the first Bioshock did. It was without a doubt, a title that has cemeted it's way into the videogame hall of fame and I have GameRankings to prove that to you with Bioshock being one of it's top ten PC games of all time. It was simply ahead of it's time and now with the return of Rapture set in place, gamers are suppose to be excited to don the suit of a Big Daddy and duke it out with legions of splicers and Big Sister... right? Well, Bioshock 2 also has dropped the bar severly this time around with visually and overall, no improvements of the previous Bioshock. In fact, all it looks like is just a Bioshock expansion pack with you in a Big Daddy suit cruising around in more generic locations around Rapture. Of course Bioshock is nothing without Rapture but would it have killed to have more cool features? Multiplayer and a new story is cool but is that all there is to it?

LEFT 4 DEAD 2

Although it still didn't, the first Left 4 Dead was the only game in this country that gave DoTA a real kick in the ass. Imagine for the first time in probably years, the concentration of gamers in cybercafe playing a zombie apocalypse first person shooter was more than that of DoTAs. It was absolutely phenomenal to watch. It was also pretty damn fun. Imagine fighting hordes of zombies, rushing in from all corners, with friends. The screaming, the kicking, the laughing, the achievment of reaching the safehouse. It was unlike any other. Left 4 Dead 2 returns with a new cast, set in the New Orleans area of America. It had cool features like melee weapons, more weapons like the supressed Mac-10, flame rounds and more special infected. However, it all just didn't seem to add up properly. The game now not only seems wierdly imbalanced, but also just plain outright... wrong. It all just didn't add up and all Valve made their newest Source based title look like some pizza full of desperate mix ideas that were all dried out.

DARK VOID

The sky is literally the limit with this one as you fill in the shoes of an American pilot that flew into the Bermuda Triangle and get sucked into some universe where robotic aliens oppress human kind and it's up to you to either save mankind or escape. Flying around like Rocketeer in an alien jetpack in all directions while hijacking alien UFOs and getting into aerial dogfights, shooting invertedly and in all sorts of directions certainly is a pretty good idea. However, the somehow uninspired locale of the new dimension and poorly crafted aliens looking like rejects of Dawn of War's Necrons just seems... well, uninspired. What could have been a sleeper hit of 2009 just in the end, turns out to be some lame generic shooter dime a dozen, crowding the market with more glorified crap. It's just another gimmick out there... another one that the industry seriously doesn't need.

BORDERLANDS

If videogames was like politics, then we have a prime example of a typical politician running from leadership here. What Borderlands essentially promises is good. Awesome cell-shaded graphics that blend well with high quality textures and also around 84 "Gazillion" weapons to choose from in an exciting open ended environment with epic missions all in the means of cooperative RPG FPS fashion. However, less than half of their promises were fulfilled. Sure there was the beautiful graphics and coop that the game couldn't run away from. However, the 84 gazillion weapons were more or less just reskins of older ones with different colour and maybe slightly different sights. They functioned the differently with different kinda perks but seriously, that wasn't important as Modern Warfare titles also have guns, which essentially function the same as well. It shoots bullets and all there is to it is how strong are those shots and how many shots can be fired per second. That's all there is to it. Besides that, the endless grinding also turns off many players which perhaps at best, serves as some waiting lounge for Modern Warfare 2.

MODERN WARFARE 2

You cannot imagine how much it pains me to put up and to criticise a game like this. Expectations were simply off the roof for this one and still despite it fullfilling it's niche as a triple A game, Modern Warfare 2 simply didn't live up to the hype surrounding it. As GameTrailers said, more like an evolution than a revolution, Modern Warfare builds upon it's foundations which makes it a stronger game. Yes, it has better weapons and a better multiplayer. It also has a cool coop spec ops mode where two friends can come together and tackle missions together but gamers expected more than just that. The singleplayer was short and sweet but however, the initial was a bit more dominant. It built on having more variety instead of just unloading caches of ammunition onto cannon fodder but there were just so many dull moments in-game that sometimes just dulled the experience. Make no mistake, Modern Warfare 2 and it's perks is a game that could generally nab a score of somewhere of 9 out of 10 area but of all it's expectations, people were expecting a 12 out of 10 which in the end, made the newest Infinity Ward title, a disappointmet of 2009.

Error 404: Sleepless Night Before Exams Again

Three fucking posts in one day... I must be getting pretty damn bored... where were you while I was getting high. Slowly walking across hall, faster than a cannonball. Some people must not know how lonely I feel in nights like these. With no one to talk to, no dreams to dream that she never dies. Just stuck here in this hostel at night while I go through all the thoughts in my mind.

Someone tells me to hold on, don't be scared, I'll never change what's been and gone. Obviously it's about Angeline and my work. How I wish I can forget. All the times I had to force myself to keep pushing on and to keep doing all my assignments regardless of how much lack of help I get. It isn't zero but there are like around six decimals of how much I get. I try not to worry and think that I'll be there someday but somehow, I just don't feel that way. I just wanna give up and die. That's how you would feel when all of your stars have faded away I guess.

My friend, someone that I just met, Alice, she's electric and I bet she's got a family full of eccentrics. She told me to tell my tutors about it. About the solo assignments. I did... the lecturers said that they would handle it.... properly. It made me feel okay for awhile. Then after that, I had to go back to my groupmates which I suppose are my friends. The lies I'm forced to say, are getting deeper everyday. These are crazy days but I suppose they make me shine. At least I'm comforted with the knowledge that this experience can make me stronger.

Still, I sometimes think that little by little, I gave them everything they ever dreamed of, little by little the wheels of their lives are slowly falling off. Perhaps I'm spoiling them in all of this and the result of their demise in the long run is caused by me. Sometimes great people are produced out of great sacrifices but who am I to say that I would be a great person? I'm not even a half decent guy and to think that I would be someone good just seems far fetched.

And all the time, I just ask myself why am I really here...

Why am I in this dreadful place?

Why am I really here?

Gosh, how far gone have I become... if I met my maker, I bet I would make him cry and if he were to ask me on my shoulder why... probably I would say cause you made my life a bit too fucking harsh for me to handle.

I miss being in the arms of someone. I miss human companionship in my life. The one where I share my deepest thoughts, intimacies and love with someone. At least someone animate for now. Not an invisible man in the sky but someone that I could say at least breathes oxygen and does not have infinite grace but at least enough for me. D'you know what I mean right? Yeah, I guess so. Someone to stand by me even though nobody knows the way it's gonna be. I don't care if she hates what I've become or if she judges me. I just need her love. Authentic love. Sick of playing with my own yellow submarine.

I guess my life should be better again once I'm in KDU. Once I'm free of all this bullshit in my life. Hopefully I would be free to be whatever I... whatever I chose and I'll sing the blues if I want. I want to be free to say whatever I like if it's wrong or right, hopefully it will be alright. I guess I always am whatever what I'm what people want me to be and I'm tired of it. To overeavaluate my actions. It always seem to me, I always see what my dad wants me to see... or maybe Ben... hehehe... I'm not sure myself.

Hopefully today is the day that they're gonna throw it back to me. I need to be myself. Not copy no one else. I'm feeling like shit and I need gin and tonic. What the fuck am I even saying. I'm not even sure myself. William says that weed is a good sleeping aid... hmm...

I'm not over my heart's desire. I feel cold but I'm back in the fire. She still dominates so much of my life. She's the stares that have faded away. I want her to come in and not come out tonight. Love is a time machine that makes my life like the silver screen I guess. All in good time, I hope that either I'd find someone like her or even better, her again. My head's in the clouds but I'll try to give myself some hope.

Why the fuck does my roommate watch Gossip Girl? Is he even a fucking man?

I need to slip inside the eye of my mind, maybe I'll find a better place to play. She says that she's never been all the things she's seen fade away but slowly but surely... hehe... I should step outside cause summertime's in bloom I guess. But I'm afraid to get my heart burned out. I know it's too late as she's walking on by. My soul slides away but I'll try not to look back in anger least that what's Phil said.

I got an exam to attend to tomorrow and I still don't know what's the story Morning Glory. Would someone please tell me? I don't know what it is that makes me feel alive. I don't know how to wake the things that sleep inside. I only want to see the light that shines behind her eyes. Maybe that's the madness of love. Almost failed my previous exams cause of her. She's what's sleeping in my soul. Cause humans need each other, we believe in each other. There are many things that I would like to know and many places I wish to go but everything's so dependent on where the wind may blow.

Man, I can't even force myself off the fucking seat and into bed. Shaun asked me am I crazy. I hope Angeline doesn't tell me to get a life. I don't think I'll mind as long that there's a bed a beneath the stars that shine. I'll be fine. I need to minute. A man needs to live it...

Can't get a life if my heart's not in it right?

I know you and I are not gonna live forever so what's the point with all my procrastination right? I need to catch the silver sunlight in her hands. I'll cover her and set her free. Lift her up and take her where she stands. She believes in everything. and everyone and you and yours and mine. I'm still gonna wait for a thousand years for her to come and blow me out my mind. Hey mew mew! The stars about to fall so what chu say mew mew? The world around me makes us feels so small mew mew. If you can't hear me call, then I can't say mew mew. Heaven hope you catch me if I fall mew mew. I'm referring to my mum of course. She's the queen of all I've seen.

Shake along with her!

Seeing Ben is kinda like seeing little children fucking in the bushes. So naive and childish just jumping in on it with all that they have without regard of what's at stake. So Ben like...

Maybe I don't really wanna know cause I just wanna fly.

I don't even know what the fuck I'm talking about at this point. I'm just gonna either crawl to bed or COD until the test starts.

Cause you and I are gonna live forever.

The best fuckin band ever

Contined at 5:59 a.m.

Insomnia must really be kicking my ass. Can't sleep and I'm up blogging again. What the fuck man. Just went and visited her blog again. Wondering what is it I'm lacking... I ain't good looking but I'm someone's child. Maybe I should just get a penis extension to something supersonic fed with gin and tonic.

I want to ride with her in her BMW, she can sit with me in my yellow submarine but I bet she would rather do something I'm pretty fucking good at. Hehehe, she probably doesn't know cause no one is gonna tell her what I'm all about.

Apparently there is someone that I'm suppose to hate very much. I'm constantly reminded of him not because I miss him or stuff like that but more like cause people that hate him constantly remind me of him which makes me continuously hate him. Some might say they don't believe in heaven. Gonna tell the man who lives in hell.

Maybe I should get some weed. And I'll get so high that I just can't feel it. Maybe after some cones, I'll my sunshine and my rain.

Ben said that he doesn't read my blog often cause it's just an array of constant rants. He claims at least Adrian's blog is sarcastically humorous. He tells me I should face the sun and cast no shadow. Be like mum... SUNSHINE!

Maybe I should be more cool. Not fake with the sunglasses but instead more... spontaneous. Maybe I should roll with it. I should take my time. I should say what I say don't let anyone get in my way. It's really too much for me to take nowadays. That way I should have much much less stress but will I have just a pile of more problems?

I think I recognize your face but I've never seen you before.

Man, I'm getting hungry. Maybe I should cook something to eat. What am I gonna do while looking at you. You standing in awe of me. I thought I heard someone say now... "You got exams tips?" "How assignment" "Hey now! Hey now". They feel no shame even time don't change.

I've got so much to catch up with. I made a meal and threw it up on Sunday. I gotta things to learn. Said I would that I believe that one day, before my heart starts to blur. What's the matter with me, cook me something new... Fuck, this is making me hungry. I hope I don't find my key on the floor. I hope I don't believe in things I find behind the door.

Nobody knows the way it's gonna be. How my mid term is gonna be. I got the tips and I feel slightly more comfortable but well, nobody knows... yeah, nobody knows the way it's gonna be... I need to talk to someone but I'm tired of talking on my phone. I can't say that my heart can't be a home... what's the matter with me? Sing me something new! I need someone to stand by me cause nobody knows the way it's gonna be.

If Ben makes more noise about what I do... I'm gonna fucking break that songbird's neck. Lets see it sing after that... hahaha!

Why did you guys fucking split up? I would have gone to your concert if you all were still together.

GameWise: Modern Warfare 2 Arsenal

While Modern Warfare 2 remains as nothing less than a smash hit, others have still yet to play it. From reasons ranging from low requirements computers, idiocracy which resulted in them buying a laptop instead, waiting to buy a new computer and etc. Many people have yet to grace the shoes of Sgt. Gary "Roach" Sanderson and his squadrons of Task Force 141 in Infinity Ward's newest brainchild.

Lingering on the minds of these people who have not had the ultimate experience yet of 2009 is, what is the weapon loadout of Modern Warfare 2? Wonder no more...



Assault Rifles;

• M4A1

• M16A2

• FAMAS

• SCAR-H

• TAR-21

• FAL

• ACR

• FN2000

• AK-47

• AUG

Sub-Machineguns;

• UMP45

• Kriss Super-V (dubbed Vector)

• P90

• HK Mp5K

• TMP

• Mini-Uzi

• PP2000

Light Machine Guns;

• RPD

• M240

• MG4

• L86

Shotguns;

• SPAS-12

• M1014

• AA12

• W1887 (dubbed Model 1887)

• Striker

• S/O Shotgun (dubbed Ranger)

Sniper Rifles;

• Walther 2000

• Dragunov SVD

• Barrett 50.cal M107

• M14EBR

• Invention M-200
  

Sidearms;

• USP.45

• Beretta M92F

• Beretta M93R

• Glock 18

• M1911

• 44 Magnum

• Desert Eagle

Attachments;

• Red Dot Sight

• Full Metal Jacket Rounds
• Dual Wielding

• Extended Mags
  
• Silencer

• EOTech

• ACOG Assault Scope

• Thermal Sights

• Grip

• MARS Sight

• Heartbeat Sensor

• Rapid Fire Barrel
  
• M203

• GP-25

• M26 Mass Modular Shotgun

Misc;

• Riot Shield

• Semtex Sticky Bombs
  
• Frag Grenades
• Flashbangs
• Throwing Knives

• Blast shield
• Claymore

• C4

• Stun Grenade
• Smoke Grenade
  

Explosives;

• RPG-7

• AT-4

• M-79 (dubbed Thumper)
  

Infinity Ward did make some promises in which I thank God was not fulfilled. According to initial reports, there was supposed to be an MGL-140 slated to be in-game as well but thankfully, no such thing has been seen. Besides the M203, GP-25 and the Thumper, there are no other grenade launching armaments in Modern Warfare 2. Let me say again;

_____________________________________________

"There is no MGL-140 grenade launcher! There is no MGL-140 grenade launcher! There is no MGL-140 grenade launcher! There is no MGL-140 grenade launcher! There is no MGL-140 grenade launcher! There is no MGL-140 grenade launcher! There is no MGL-140 grenade launcher! There is no MGL-140 grenade launcher! There is no MGL-140 grenade launcher! There is no MGL-140 grenade launcher! There is no MGL-140 grenade launcher!!!"

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